Sunday thought: who would Jesus hang out with today?

While Ron, our pastor, read the lesson today on Peter pulling Jesus aside and telling him he probably shouldn't talk about going to Jerusalem and getting killed, I couldn't help but think about who Jesus would hang out with and who would he not get along with if he came to the U.S. today.

Based on the stories in the Gospels, I'd think it would probably go something like this:

- He would probably have some contact with a prophet or preacher who would be in trouble with the law/government (aka John the Baptizer)
- He would get men to leave their family businesses and learn to recruit others (fishers of men)
- He would then go to public places and start preaching and he would heal mentally ill people and those with physical afflictions
- He would become so popular that huge crowds would congregate wherever he went
- As he preached and healed, preachers from all denominations of Christendom would find something about him that they thought contradicted the Bible and would start to criticize him.
- He would then be "caught" eating dinner with prostitutes, bankers, porn producers, movie moguls, Pro-Choicers, and lawyers. Elders, ministers, and deacons from all the great faiths would condemn him for doing so. He would say that he didn't come for the righteous- for they don't need salvation.
- He would then be photographed by a cell phone camera playing golf on a Sunday morning with OJ Simpson. Even Joel Osteen and his kind would now say this is obviously not the Christ. Jesus would be shown on a Youtube video telling his detractors that Sunday was made for man, not man for Sunday.
- He would then be seen by people giving comfort to a woman in a Planned Parenthood office. Leaders of many faiths would then immediately leave and plot against him- some seeking assasination, others seeking remedy through the courts.
- Jesus would be overheard warning people to beware of contemporary preacher's and politician's words. This would be touted in the papers as treason and heresy and inflame both sides of the political aisle. Democrats and Republicans would join religious leaders in unanimously condemning him.
- Jesus would then tell his followers that he was to be rebuked by the elders of the church, preachers of the chief denominations, judges of the legal system, and political chieftains. His top follower would tell him not to go against the powers that be- to which he would reply, "Satan, get away from me."
- Jesus would then be engaged in a series of debates with lawyers, judges, politicians, and religious leaders. After each debate each group would grow more fearful of his popularity with the people and their subsequent loss of power.

We all know how it ends in the New Testament. Would this happen to him today too? Or would he hang out with Middle and Upper-Class Americans, reveling in our contemporary issues? He came to Earth to the Jews: an occupied people. If He came back now would he hang out with the modern-day Roman Imperial citizenry?